Northend Nique

It's Over and I'm Cold.

It's 20 degrees outside and I am freezing. It did manage to snow some and being as it's still so freakin' cold out we still have a little bit, places where the sun doesn't really hit. Man, I hate the cold but I love snow. Hey, at least when there's snow on the ground you've got something to show for all this cold icky weather.
Anyway, it's finally over, the Thanksgiving holiday. Hope everyone had a good day. Mine turned out pretty well. This year it was decided, without my knowledge of course, that I would be hosting the pigging-out party. Thanks go out to my mother and Bubba for deeming me (and my house) ready for these family functions. I've never been one for the traditional Thanksgiving and Christmas meals. Don't get me wrong, I like the togetherness (cheezy, I know) but the actual meal itself I could live without. One of the things I'm thankful for is that we only do this once a year. We have a Christmas breakfast instead of dinner. WOOHOO! That I love!
Now, for those of you who don't know, my family is quite small. There's Dan and I plus the Queen. My mom and dad live next door so I see them a few times a week. My husbands best friend, Bubba, who is like a brother to me (we have been known to throw food at each other at family gatherings) and attends ALL family functions, yes, even Christmas morning festivities, lives next door to my parents. The only other family is my Grandmother, Mimi, and although she lives on the other side of town I still see her about once a week. So getting everyone together is really no big thing since we all see each other so often. It's a typical family... my mother is neurotic (me? never!). My dad is so laid back you have to check if he's still breathing. Bubba is actually my ex-boyfriend, the best man at our wedding, and I'm his only ex that he's still friends with. Mimi, my mother's mother... see above comment about neurotic mother now multiply by 10. The Queen is CRAZY INSANE. I mean the girl bounces off the walls most of the time. Dan, well, he has a knack for being missing until the last minute, hiding out from my family I'm sure. Me? I'm fabulous and how can anyone compete with that? Sorry, had to pick myself up off the floor from that comment!
Anyway, since my new kitchen/living room is pretty much finished the decision to have me make everything apparently came easy. I now have the largest kitchen. Well, really the most countertop. Mom said, upon finally informing me, "I will buy all the food if you cook it all!" She seemed so excited. She said she really wanted to show off all the handy work that my dad, Dan and Bubba did. Ok, does that seem weird to anyone else? Who exactly are we showing all this off too? We've all been watching this damned project for like A YEAR! There's no one in our family that hasn't seen this shack before. I really think she wanted to have it here because I have a dishwasher. I agreed. Crap, what we do to make our families happy (and have a free meal).
I have had this peculiar habit at Thanksgiving for a few years now and this year I had to nip it in the bud. The first year Dan and I were married my mother conned me into cooking the turkey for Thanksgiving. The night before I proceeded to go out with my friends and get trashed. Mind you, I had to get up at like 6 a.m. to put that freakin' turkey in the oven. I did make it up at the proper time. I felt like the Dunkin' Donuts guy... "gotta make the turkey." Hung over like a wet sweater on the shower rod, I opened the refrigerator door to get that nasty thing out and blood poured out all over the floor and onto my bare feet. I was sooo disgusted. I ran to the bedroom, woke Dan up and pleaded with him to help me. I couldn't do this job I had signed up for. I showered while Dan made the turkey that year. Mom never asked me to make the bird again. Did I mention I'm really not fond of turkey? Thankfully I could go out Thanksgiving Eve with my friends, drink as much as I wanted and never have to see a raw turkey again, at least for the next 9 years. I swore this year, since I was on bird duty once again, that I wouldn't repeat my habits of years past and I would stay home sans alcohol so I wouldn't have to #1 wake Dan at some ungodly hour to help my stupid ass out and #2 so I wouldn't feel like I was going to ruin EVERYONE'S meal by yakking on the bird.
Thanksgiving morn, I woke, right on time I might add, no hangover, ready for finally doin' right! I opened the fridge and DAMNIT! the blood waterfall all over again! I have realized that being hungover doesn't really matter when it comes this phenomenon. It's nasty no matter what! WHY DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING TO ME? P.S. Don't tell me to put it in a pan next time... I know already and I'm NOT DOING THE FUCKING TURKEY AGAIN! There is nothing like standing in your pj's with turkey spooge, blood and random liquids all over your feet and clothes you were hoping to jump back into bed in after this was all over. You should be happy to know that I did manage to get it all completed though with only minimal help from a cranky Dan. I mean, c'mon how the hell am I supposed to get that humongous turkey into that stupid plastic bag all by myself? It weighed 26 pounds for christsakes!
After all that the rest of the preparations went decently well. Even the mashed potato incident, where I was trying to point at Bubba while holding the mixer, that was running, in the potato pot, flinging mashed potatoes EVERYWHERE. People filtered in and out (since we all live on the same block) snacking, drinking and chatting. It all came together pretty damn well if I say so myself. We sat down to eat only 1/2 an hour late. Can we all notice that Dom's got a time management problem? :) There wasn't even any food throwing. The Queen was smart and put us at separate tables.
Mom was so happy that it all went so well and she was ecstatic to be able to put the dishes in the dishwasher she got right to it as soon as folks were done eating. She managed to scrape the dishes into the wrong side of the sink. I looked in there as the filthy water swirled around and said, "You know mom, the disposal is on the other side of sink." "It will be fine." she says and continues on. I ran that load of dishes while we all hooted and hollered over a few rousing games of Uno. Yes, beer played prominently in that game. Some of us were laughing so hard we were crying! Then, it being time for everyone's post-Thanksgiving coma, my house was empty again. Whew!
When I came out of my own coma I decided I should finish up the kitchen. Wait! Why the hell isn't any water draining out of the sink? Yep, drain is clogged. "It will be fine" my ass! I plunge until I hear water pouring out on the floor from somewhere in the bathroom. We work on it for awhile... pour some junk down it and decide to wait til morning. The next morning we get started and now not only is water coming out in the bathroom it is now coming up and leaking out of the dishwasher. AAAAACK! Thanks mom... let's do it again next year, shall we?
Did I also mention that the day after Thanksgiving was Dan's birthday? Man, this time of year kills me.

posted by Dominique @ 8:42 AM